Jerky Boys - Sol Rosenberg and the Optometrist

I took this mid flight as the bird flew
past me.  He has a big worm in his beak.

3-24-12  I was supposed to run yesterday but we got severe storms again in the late afternoon when I got off work.  I am running the half marathon tomorrow, Sunday.  I decided to do a short, easy run today rather than go 3 days without running.  I ran 4 miles this morning, it was 55 degrees and such a nice change from the last few days of hot weather.   It was really nice and no more back pain.  My kitchen is a mess and I really should sweep and mop the floor but it usually takes me a couple of hours and then my back hurts.  I figure that the floor dirt won't go away and will still be there for me to clean it tomorrow or later int he week. I am really anxious to get through tomorrow, big milestone and I want to feel good.  Gotta do everything I can to ensure that!

I have to go to church for the 7:30 mass.  They have this ministry fair after each mass today and tomorrow.  Every group that possibly tries to get volunteers, sets up a table and the parishioners walk through after church.  There are sign-up sheets for the different groups/committee, choir, greeters, finance committees, school board, home & school (PTA), coaching opportunities, etc.  When I signed up, didn't realize I would be running.  at least I got the early mass so I run run later in the morning.

Today I listened to the Jerky Boys.  Jeff made this CD for me years ago.  The calls were made by ringing up unsuspecting recipients, or in response to classified advertisements placed in local New York based newspapers.  They are pretty funny , a bit crude, but a fun change for a run.  I laughed a lot which probably looks odd when you are running alone, oh well.  The one below is a favorite of mine.  Sol Rosenberg is a middle aged, whiny, paranoid jew from New York. 

Sol: Hello, I bought glasses there, my name is Sol Rosenberg.
Optometrist: Yes?
Sol: And my eyes are going crazy.
Optometrist: Okay. Let me pull your file. Hold on..
Sol: Okay, thank you
Optometrist: Hello, did you go to the Empire State Building?
Sol: I went to the Empire State Building and I can't see so good...
Optometrist: Would you like to come see us?
Sol: I went to the observatory and, because of these glasses, I can't see, Goddamn it.
Optometrist: Okay, would you like to come in and see us?
Sol: Sure. Okay
Optometrist: We're at 30 East 60th Street.
Sol: 35 78th Street, Ok.
Optometrist: No, no..30..three zero
Sol: okay
Optometrist: East 60th Street.
Sol: Alright. And should I bring all my glasses with me?
Optometrist: Do you need an examination?— Mr. Rosenberg, do you need an examination?
Sol: Okay.
Optometrist: Do you need an examination?
Sol: Alright.
Optometrist: Yeah, alright. Do you need an appointment?
Sol: Right. And I'll bring all my shoes and my glasses with me... so I have them.
Optometrist: Mr. Rosenberg?
Sol: Sure.
Optometrist: Do you need...do you want to see the opthamologist?
Sol: Right.
Optometrist: Do you need an appointment?
Sol: I'm sorry.
Optometrist: Do you need an appointment?
Sol: Okay.
Optometrist: Okay, hold on, I'll have my girl make an appointment for you to see the doctor. Okay, do you have the address?
Sol: Fantastic then.
Optometrist: Do you have the address?
Sol: Yeah.
Optometrist: What's the... what room?
Sol: I don't know...you say 35-8-7?
Optometrist: No. 30 East 60 th Street
Sol: 30 East 50 th Street Okay. Thank you.
Optometrist: Do you need an appointment? hold on.....

Every time I hear that it cracks me up.  "okay and I'll bring all my shoes and glasses with me"  shoes?? to the optometrist?  Oh My!